Answers
by Moore12
Summary: A short story featuring Littlecloud and Cinderheart. The narrations alternate between the two, and it tells the story of what happens when they finally encounter each other.


_Disclaimer: I do not own the Warriors series or characters. However, I do own this plot. _

Looking back on it now, after all these moons have passed, I still can't believe I lived through all this, that my life has been one tragedy after another. First Brokenstar, then Tigerstar, then Cinderpelt's death, then Sol…Sometimes, I feel like I've been through more than even the most embattled warrior even though I'm "only" a medicine cat…

_Sometimes, the other cats look at me funny. I don't understand it. I'm just a normal cat, aren't I? Sure, I even surprise myself; I don't even know why I know some of the things I do. Like that time when I felt like I had met a badger before in battle even though I knew I couldn't have…_

When I was with her, when she saved my life all those moons ago, back when we lived in the forest, that forest that had seen too much, I was able to forget. Forget the pain, the hunger, the isolation, something that I had never been able to do. I could forget that my mentor made a sport of tearing me to pieces, leaving his claws unsheathed during practice bouts. I could forget that Brokenstar pushed us into battle against WindClan unjustly, and I was, at a mere five moons, pushed to fight more experienced, bigger warriors because of his greed and was nearly killed. I could forget all this, even though it had left eternal scars, because she _cared _about me…

_I can never remember the dreams I have, although I know I dream of a forest I have never seen, of cats I don't recognize. A dark gray cat with a flattened face, her features barely visible, sometimes comes to me in my dreams. But when I chase her, I can never catch her. Even though I can't explain it, I _know _all the herbs, can recognize them by scent and sight. And I've never been trained as a medicine cat. Like I said, I surprise myself. And I know I'll be able to find the truth, when I find the right cat to ask. Even though I can tell Leafpool knows, I'm not as mouse-brained as a kit; she wouldn't tell me even if I clawed her ears…_

And then she had to die…

_Why do I feel like this has happened before? Why do I know I've felt this pain before, that this leg has been already been broken, breaking my heart with it? This can't be! Who am I? _

Sure, I had become a medicine cat for more than just that reason. I am, admittedly, the size of an apprentice even though those days are long gone. I'm not a fighter, I can't bear to hurt other cats, and, honestly, probably couldn't. But I did it for _her_. To see her more than just at Gatherings, to be able to be her friend even across Clan boundaries. I knew we couldn't be more than that but I couldn't say goodbye. Not after everything she had done for me. And then she had to leave me…

_While my leg has healed, I still have questions. So many questions. Why do there have to be secrets? I just want to be a normal cat, so I'll try to forget those dreams, forget the fact that sometimes I know things I shouldn't. I'm going to live my life, even if I don't know everything about it. Because, sometimes knowledge isn't always power, and all it can do is hurt…_

What's the point of being a medicine cat if I can't communicate with her in StarClan?

_Everything has returned to normal. I no longer dream of the forest, no longer have nightmares where I'm standing on a Thunderpath with a monster bearing down on me, the wind buffeting my fur, the furious gaze of its eyebeams fixed on me—its kill. Forgetting has proven to be easy, so easy. Ignorance is bliss. I'm finally what I wanted to be! A warrior! Even though my bad leg almost prevented me from becoming one, Jayfeather took me swimming to help it recover, and I'm finally a warrior. After too many moons of waiting, I've _finally_ fulfilled my destiny…_

Just when my newest scars were beginning to heal, he came. That crow-food eating, mangy, fox-hearted excuse of a cat. Pardon my language, I just _hate _him. Sol…How could a cat claim that StarClan didn't exist? That couldn't be possible, I communicated with them in my dreams, they had watched over me during my torturous, loveless kithood. Hadn't they? I was nearly swayed to believe his lies, after all, how much pain have I been through? Where was StarClan when Tigerstar rose to power, when he nearly killed me to shut me up for suggesting that he shouldn't be leader after I had received a prophecy? But then I remembered Cinderpelt and knew that StarClan had watched over me then, when I found her and she found me…

_And then, I see him, and, from the look on his face, I know he is the one to tell me the secrets of my past, and, suddenly, the pact I made with myself to try to forget vanishes, and I thirst for knowledge…_

While Sol was evil, and he almost destroyed my Clan, he didn't only cause only harm. I found Cinderpelt because of him…

_I recognized that familiar scent while out hunting, even though I didn't know why it was so familiar. That harsh, nasty scent of ShadowClan mixed with the lighter, gentler scent of healing herbs. Littlecloud! But what was he doing in our territory and how did I know it was him? But then I remembered that Sol had essentially taken over ShadowClan and had deemed that medicine cats weren't important or necessary, so maybe he was taking refuge at the ThunderClan camp like Tawnypelt and her kits, Flamepaw, Dawnpaw and Tigerpaw. Regardless of why he is here, I _need_ to talk to him, so I raced back to camp…_

I couldn't hide my shock when saw the fluffy, gray she-cat with the beautiful blue eyes when I turned around to leave after telling Tawnypelt the good news, that ShadowClan had returned to the warrior code. It was Cinderpelt, but it couldn't be. Could it?

_Knowing I shouldn't, but wanting to anyway, I follow Littlecloud and Tawnypelt. I keep well behind them, my scent hidden because I had rolled in mushrooms, hoping to get a chance to talk to him. Because he knows what Leafpool knows and won't tell me, and maybe he'll tell me the truth. Even if it hurts, I've decided I want to know it…_

Even though she had tried to disguise her scent by rolling in mushrooms, I knew it was her. So, I sent Tawnypelt ahead and waited at the border until I knew she was gone. I called out, "I know you're following me. Come out!" and she emerged from the underbrush, her eyes smiling at me like they had when I became a medicine cat apprentice. Did she know who I was?

_"Littlecloud!" I exclaim. He blinks twice, staring at me with a shocked expression on his face, his jaw dropped open like a kit being scared by a nursery story. And then, I cut to the chase. "I need to ask you something. Do…Do you know who I am?" _

Realization tore through me like a thorn. I couldn't reach Cinderpelt not because she didn't care about me anymore, but because she was back here, living the life she had always wanted to. A mixture of grief and happiness filled me. I knew what I had to do…

_Littlecloud lowers his eyes to the earth, as if thinking, and finally meows, his mew devoid of any emotion, "Cinderheart right? The new ThunderClan warrior? What are you doing here?" I stare at him in disbelief; he clearly doesn't know anything about me, doesn't have the answers. I turn and run…_

I had to let her go…

_The moons go by, and, once again, I'm moving on. I'm not haunted by those dreams anymore, and I know who I am. Cinderheart! My life is mine and no other cat's…_

At least I know that she's okay, even though it killed me to say goodbye once more…


End file.
